Confessions/Revelations of an R.A., Part I

From R.A. to R.A.

I take the name of this blog entry from Olivia Perry’s old blog from when she was an RA. I just needed to give her props for that.

WARNING: This blog may be rather scattered and non-sequential, so please bear with me.

Over the past two months I transitioned from an R.A. to an R.A. R.A. in the former sense refers to my life as a fairly independent Research Assistant at a rather large university. However, in the latter sense, R.A. means Resident Assistant of Sutherland at Covenant College.

Despite the acronymic consistency in these roles, there is little that the two share in common. Given this, I have been asking myself several questions: Which do I enjoy more? Which is more difficult? Which challenges me more?

I’ve discovered that there is seriously no comparison and subsequently no answer to any of these questions. Being a Research Assistant gives you strict boundaries of what you’re supposed to do: go into the lab, do work, get pissed at the computer program that isn’t working correctly, go to lunch, run subjects, and go home. But being a Resident Assistant does not allow for this consistency. On the other hand, my time as a Research Assistant was much more academically and professionally challenging than right now; it’s nice to be at college and not be concerned with classes ☺

Life is crazy, but it is so, so, so very blessed. I’m a fan.

Since my mind operates in lists and check-marks, this list should give you an idea of how I’m doing:

1. You think you know, but you have no idea. . . really rings clear in my mind right now. Thank you MTV.

2. Did you know?! When your R.A. asks you to have a meal with him/her, 97% of the time it’s probably not because you did something wrong or because of disciplinary reasons. It’s probably because your R.A. genuinely wants to get to know you better. In fact, that’s one of the reasons your R.A. was hired! Because he/she person sees the importance of student development and investing in the lives of others! We’re not “paid friends.” Imagine that.

3. Being an R.A. provides a way for Satan to isolate you. You must be humble and allow yourself to be loved or you will die a slow and painful spiritual and emotional death. Sorry for the macabre description, but it’s very true.

4. I understand why my past R.A.’s did some of the things they did and I respect them more for it now.

5. I don’t think anyone can understand what it’s like to be an R.A. unless you are an R.A. I know I didn’t (see #1).

6. Being an R.A. really makes you realize that you’re not the sh*t and that you can learn from and be blessed by people you’re leading. The humility in leadership I have experienced is so beautiful and is one way Yahweh has loved me recently.

7. I like the creativity and imagination that being an R.A. requires. My mind is being stretched in cool ways.

8. Did you know?! Don’t be afraid to challenge, call out, ask questions to, or pray with your R.A. We all need these varied encouragements. Your R.A. is just as broken and screwed up as you think you are. And if you don’t think you are, look to the Gospel.

9. I have really grown to love and cherish my relationships with my friends not on my hall. I think God is using this experience to encourage me to not take these people for granted anymore. Thank you Alex, Tim, Josh, Jackson, Febre, Bergs, Beth, Austin, Anne, Snuggs, Jon, and anyone else I missed. You all have really shown me the love of Christ in different and truly beautiful ways.

10. It’s really difficult for me to allow myself to be loved, but I think God is growing me in this way. I’m getting better at letting my guard down when appropriate.

To be continued. . .

The Malleability of Fashion.

Things that were cool, but aren’t cool anymore.
- Baggy jeans
- Velour jumpsuits
- Fohawks -->
(See excessive hair gel for a similar explanation)
- Colored contact lenses -->
I will admit, when I was going through one of my 202130938 identity crises, I fell into this one. I was thinking, “why do all my white friends have cool colored eyes!?” And then I probably listened to a Sum41 song and wrote an angry poem. All that to say, just be satisfied with your eye color.
- Acid washed jeans

Things that were cool, became not cool, and are now cool again.
- Jorts
Skinny jeans
- Film cameras
- Polaroid cameras
- Ray-bans
- Your grandmother’s glasses
-Getting preggo at age 12 -->
From my understanding, getting married and then having children at an extremely young age was the norm (my grandmother had my uncle at age 14 – she was married). Then came the women’s rights movement and the advocacy of “the pill” and other forms of birth control. But now, the general mindset is, “Morals? Condoms? What are you talking about? I’m 12 and I am more than ready to have my own tv sho… baby.” Idiots. Hopefully we can move this one into the “not cool” category soon.
- Being black -->
I’ll keep this one short: Africa was chill, then slavery wasn’t, and now that it’s cool to be tan, “have black friends,” adopt little black babies (just wait until Brangelina has to fix that girl’s nappy head of hair), and support Obama… boom. Black people, we have arrived. Soak it in, because it’s back to the soul food kitchen for you as soon as soon as Obama does something to piss everyone off.
- 90s Fashion
- Being Jewish

Things that were never cool, and thank God, will never be cool.
- Socks with sandals
- Tramp stamps (or the male counterpart, champ stamps)
- Fanny packs
- ED HARDY -->
If I wanted to wear to have skulls, roses, and thorns all intertwined with glitter and sequins on my t-shirt, I would drive to Myrtle Beach and buy a trashy “Biker Week” commemorative t-shirt. I don’t understand how/why this crap ever became popular. I mean, do you really want to wear a brand supported by Jon Gosselin? He’s got 8 kids and baby-mama addicted to fame and botox. AWESOME ROLE MODEL.

Things that most of us thought were cool, but understand to never be cool. Ever.
-Excessive hair gel -->
I recently witnessed a young, gangly teenage boy with gelled spikes all over his head. Needless to say, I would love to be there 10 years down the road when he sees pictures of his poor, teenage angst ridden decision. Growing up is tragically beautiful.
- Hot Topic
- Milli Vanilli

I know I can’t speak for everyone, but I was in the airport earlier today and I saw someone with jorts and I decided to write about it. And it all developed into this blog post.

Ciao for now.

"Coffee is the medium by which all things good are cultivated."

Ok. Maybe that's not the exact quote. But it got your attention, right?

But let's be honest. Coffee is like sweet elixer to my mind, body, and soul. I love everything about it... the smell, the taste, the warmth, sometimes the coldness... ahh... (As I thought about what to say in this next sentence, I was going to place my rankings of priorities in life, but I think that a number of people would be appalled by how high up coffee ranks. So, I'll keep that to myself.)

Yes, I admit I have a problem... blah, blah, blah. Whatever. People don't realize that one of the most important things about doing something about a problem you have is that you have to care that you have a problem. I have a problem (chemical dependency) and I don't care. In my opinion, things could be worse. Everyone has a vice. Some people are addicted to crack cocaine (similar "peppy" effects). I've just chosen an addiction that is common and in high demand EVERYWHERE.

I could talk about coffee for days (I'm at a coffee shop right now)... but I'll close with this: Morning people wake up ready to start the day with a good breakfast, Ke$ha wakes up in the morning feelin' like P. Diddy, and I wake up in the morning only craving a Venti Starbucks Double Shot on ice. It's all relatively the same.

Anyway, since this is my personal blog, I should talk about my life. In short: it's awesome and I can't complain. I'm sure I have related this before, but I am so thankful to God for this summer. It has been absolutely incredible and I am blessed beyond belief. It's come with it's fair share of struggles (mainly bouts with loneliness and a ton of intellectual/philosophical mind-debates), but I feel that every moment of my life up to this point has been preparing me for everything I am encountering this summer (specifically in St. Louis).

Last weekend I was a groomsman in the wedding of two of my oldest and closest friends. It was incredible. I cannot explain how much I was blessed by that weekend. You could just feel the Holy Spirit moving as two Godly families came together with loving friends and other loved ones to get Tim & Katie hitched :) Also, if you're wondering: Yes, I cried. Tears typically don't come out of my face like that because I lack a proper outlet for emotions (different day, different blog), but I was just overtaken by the emphasis of the covenant of marriage. It's just too beautiful for words. It also meant even more to me because I've known these people for 6+ years. I have literally been able to witness God work in their lives in the past to bring to them to the present. So yes, I cried. I cried tears of joy.

But, I will admit. I am not a good crier. My nose runs, the tears get in my mouth, which makes my mouth water from the salt content, which makes me self-conscious, etc. It's bad. Let's revisit a moment from after the ceremony, shall we?

Jess: Oh Hope, I heard you crying during the ceremony! :)
Hope: Um no, that was Rashad.
Katherine: Yeah I kept nudging him to SHUT UP!
Rashad: LEAVE ME ALONE I'M JUST REALLY HAPPY RIGHT NOW!!!

This is my life ^

Ok this is the last thing I'm going to say about the wedding: it was also a blessing because I was able to get to know a guy I admire and have a ton of respect for. It's weird. We were friends before, but now I feel like we're "legit" friends (if that makes sense), and that's always a blessing.


IN OTHER NEWS... I have exactly one month left until I head back to Covenant for RA training. This means I have even less time in St. Louis :( and that I will be going to Europe with Felton quite soon :). AND next weekend I'm going to another wedding in Florida (flying this time). Wahoooo!!! I'd be even more excited if it wasn't for the bloody oil spill.

Going back to being RA. . . I am SO excited. I miss Sutherland. I can't wait to get back on the hall and live in a community of guys again. There's something about it that's so spiritually unique and fulfilling to my soul.

Speaking of soul, Lauryn Hill is recording new music and everyone should be excited.

I can't wait to get back into taking voice lessons and singing again. And playing piano. I miss making music so much. I need it.

Well, time to leave Coffee Cartel. Ciao.

Lately.

Wow, I haven't blogged in a while. Actually, you know who hasn't blogged in a longer time? Hannah Vanbiber. She must think that no one wants to hear about her life since she isn't in England anymore. She also claims to be "busy" being in Jamaica, New Orleans, and Florida. Lies. All lies.

Anyway, I have been enjoying life here in St. Louis, and I feel that God has been especially gracious to me. It's difficult for me to adjust from being in Christian education (and some form of Christian community) my whole life (what a sheltered life I lead) to a secular environment. It's good for me to be exposed to different worldviews and stand my ground in my faith; I feel like this is what WCCS tried to do and what Covenant does well. I don't want to make myself sound like a hero, like I have valiently done battle with the evil, ungodly world and won, because that would not be painting an accurate picture of the work Christ is currently doing in my life. He has placed me in a good mindset to be able to discern truth from lies. I have never seen the statement, "all truth is God's truth," come more alive than I have during my time thus far at WashU. Doing science can be tricky, what with the theory of evolution practically accepted as a theorem, and the humanism that runs rampant through laboratories. But, all of my time in the lab working with older adults has taught me that all of it points to an immaculate Creator-God. One whom loves those He has graciously made in His own image.

While I enjoy being here, and I find it a HUGE blessing to have this internship. I can't help but feel a certain yearning for my community of believers back home. I think that my loneliness in that arena has stunted me from branching out into community here. I pray that will change soon (as soon as I return from the wedding of two of my closest, oldest friends :)). But last night, I missed some things.

I miss having one-on-one, face-to-face conversations with my best friend.
I miss going on dates.
I miss late night conversations with 214 that usually end in heterosexual cuddling.
I miss 214 in general.
I miss Sutherland.
I miss silently judging Ben for his excessive cursing.
I miss violently threatening Ben's life daily.
I miss Casey making up rumors about me and referring to me as "Rashad girl."
I miss people making fun of how ridiculous I am.
I miss Destany. Enough said.
I miss Anne coming up and telling me about something hilarious in her day that would ONLY happen to her.
I miss Bergs watching me through her creeper windows and texting me, "where are you going?" anytime I leave Mac/Rymer.
I miss judging excessive PDA with Sutherland.
I miss T3.
I miss sitting in Mills 270/280.
I miss having way too many coffee dates to function.
I miss nights in the Psych Commons with Austin, Bergs, and whomever else drops by.
I miss getting people to buy me food at the Blink because I spent all mine already.
I even miss being extremely angry about how much dinner sucked.
I miss Felton coming in my room and distracting me from doing anything productive.
I miss watching people as they come to that area past the salad bar and desperately look for their friends or someone cool to sit with.
I miss...

I could literally go on for hours about what I miss. It makes me remember how blessed I am and it also makes me remember how excited I will be to return to those blessings.

I should probably go to bed now. Busy day tomorrow.

Ciao for now.

This is Regret.

Margot: Why'd you do it? Because of me?
Richie: Yeah, but it's not your fault.
Margot: You're not going to do it again, are you?
Richie: I doubt it.
[Margot starts to cry]

~ The Royal Tenenbaums

Blessings.

Currently listening to: The Fame Monster by Lady Gaga

My realizations of just how much God has richly blessed me are just now starting to sink in. I have a wonderful internship in my field of study, I have stable relationships with people who love me and for whom that deep love is reciprocated, and God has been answering prayers left and right. I don't think I would have said any of this last summer. Of course, in hindsight, last summer was a time of growing because of the difficulties that accompanied the situations I encountered. But, it's also good to be able to see growth while the growing is occurring. No, this is not always the case; but damn, is it nice to breathe for a change. So often in my life, I feel that I have barely kept my head above water. . . I'm constantly gasping for breath, sometimes even holding it. But right now, God has given me rest and peace through Him. Also, and most importantly, I am confident that He is slowly but surely molding me into His likeness.

All of the things I stated above may seem like common sense to the mature, experienced, Reformed Christian. But, keep in mind: I am young; I am a cynic; and I am a pessimist. That being said, I'm shocked at the words that I'm typing are actually "looking on the bright side." It's quite atypical.

Looking back on my first week in a novel environment, these things have stuck out to me specifically and have greatly enriched and blessed me:

1. I received a long email from a friend earlier this week. I don't know this friend extremely well, but God really used his words to bless me. I can't even really explain it, it just meant a lot. I always look forward to getting to know Godly men on a deeper level, and hopefully this will be the case.

2. I had an excellent time smoking hookah and opening up to a good friend last night. I typically don't open up easily, but I also know that vulnerability breeds vulnerability. So hopefully, this relationship will continue to deepen and God would bless it.

3. Mac/Rymer RA staff is going to be awesome. That's all I have to say.

4. I am certain that Psychology is what I want to do and what I am called to right now. That is comforting.

Ciao for now :)

Need to Feel.

Ok. So. I'm a pretty unemotional person. If I ever do become emotional, I cover my feelings up and never, never talk about them for fear that someone would feel sorry for me. Yes, yes, I know that this is not psychologically healthy and that I should talk about my "feelings," but I just don't like to do that. Maybe it's some masculinity complex or something. Who knows?

Anyway, the point of this blog post is that I'm admitting that I had my feelings hurt by someone I consider like a brother to me (I still do) and it's been eating at me for a while. I mean, I will definitely never talk to this brother about the hurt because it'd be inappropriate, but it's really there. I just feel really slighted, and it hurts. It'd kind of like a dull pain though. Not like the sharp pain of being "friend dumped," which I also experienced last year. No, this is more like a dull nagging pain that just bores a pinhole into your heart.

This probably doesn't make sense to most of you, but this post was mainly just for me to get something out.

Ciao.

Forgiveness.

I am the least qualified person to make any sort of post on forgiveness, so I apologize in advance that I am not an expert on that which I will discuss in detail.

If you know me, or anything about my personal life, then you know that I am a man of extremes. No, I am a man of extreme extremes. A friend once told me once over sushi (not a direct quote), "Rashad, when you love, you love so very deeply and it's great. But when you hate, you really, really hate..."

That friend boldly loved me by telling me blunt truth. I have numerous people that I love, and love deeply. If you're one of these people, I guarantee to you that you know it. But, on the opposite end of that spectrum, there are a couple of people that I hate. I know I hate them and I hate my hatred. But it's there, and it paralyzes me spiritually and emotionally. My motives behind my hatred are bitterly entangled in numerous conflicts, hurt feelings, arguments, etc. But, I've been learning lately that at the root of all of this is. . . sin.

My hatred of other people is absolutely sinful. Yes, I have been sinned against, and that is wrong; but also, I have sinned (and am sinning) against those people by not forgiving him. Dr. Dan Allender, in his book, Bold Love, puts it like this:

If forgiveness, fulfilled in reconciliation is to occur, evil must repent with clarity and conviction. (p. 251)

If forgiveness is defined as a continuing process of hungering for restoration, revoking revenge, and offering good gifts, then we are to forgive until there is reconciliation. But reconciliation should not occur until there is repentance. (p.251)

I like that Dr. Allender uses the terms forgiveness, reconciliation, repentance, and restoration in easily identifiable, different terms. I tend to jumble all of those aspects into one, neglecting the complexity of love.

Forgiveness is active and this repentance requires a humility that cannot come from me. I mean, offering good gifts? I can barely look at those I hate without judging and feeling my blood pressure rise. How am I to offer them good gifts? And then there's that statement, "forgive until...." It seems to me that forgiveness may lend the forgiver out to dreadful abuse. But, at the same time, I know that that is a lie from Satan that he wishes to use in order to entangle me in more sin and less repentance. My road to forgiveness begins with humble repentance, and grace shall abound from there.

In the midst of all of this, I know that I must remember the Gospel, which forgives horrible sinners, like me, and those people I hate, regardless of the offense and no matter how deep it may cut. Christ continually offers His children restoration, does not seek revenge, offers us an abundance of treasures in heaven, and will continually pursue us until the day of completion. He does this, even though we spit on him daily, flippantly brushing off his vast forgiveness.

I'm reminded of this stanza of How Deep the Father's Love for Us as I type this post:

Behold the Man upon a cross
My guilt upon His shoulders
Ashamed, I hear my mocking voice
Call out among the scoffers
It was my sin that held Him there
Until it was accomplished
His dying breath has brought me life
I know that it is finished

Father, enable me to love as deeply and humbly forgive and be forgiven, just as You have done for me and for them.

iRead.

I stopped sleeping.

If anyone cares, here is my summer reading list, which is open for suggestion (especially from Josh Johnson or Hannah Vanbiber):

Anna Karenina by Leo Tolstoy
The Four Loves by C.S. Lewis
The Prodigal God by Tim Keller
Crazy Love by Francis Chan
Epic by John Eldridge

Feel free to suggest away.

I Don't "Chill."

Listening to: Nickel Creek


Ah, it tastes like a South Carolina summer. The humidity in the air, the false politeness, and graduations looming around the corner. Two years ago, I was on the other side of most of that. It's amazing what two years on a mountain will do to you.

Ever since I've been back home, I've been in kind of a funk. Trust me, the rest has been absolutely wonderful. However, I'm just finding myself unmotivated to do anything; this is entirely unlike me. I'm going to attribute my lackadaisical mindset to the odd amount of down time I have until the internship starts. . . I'm sure things will pick up then for certain.

Nevertheless, I am not the kind of person who can just "relax." I don't relax. Ever. So, in addition to watching Dexter, I'm going to continue my "summer-after-college" tradition of watching movise that I said, Hell no, you moron. I can't watch a movie, because that would be fun. I'm don't have fun. You're trying to distract me! to during the school year.

First on the list is: American Beauty, followed by Hard 8.

As far as reading goes, I'll have to gather those thoughts tomorrow. Hopefully, I'll wake up before 1pm. That would be a good start. . . yeah, you should probably go back and read the beginning of the post to understand my critical dilemma.

Ciao for now.

Quite Unsettling.

WOW. I think it would be far too cliche to say that 'time flies,' so: it seems like just a week ago that I moved into Maclellan/Rymer for the first time on a new hall and started my sophomore year at Covenant. This year has been better than last, but I feel somewhat unfinished right now, which is probably why I'm up so late blogging about it.

I thrive on relationships with others, and I feel that this year has been really solid in that aspect. I've been able to harness new relationships and seriously strengthen and better old ones. I've also had the misfortune of severing relationships. But, I can honestly say that now, now that I'm at the end of this awkward cluster of time, I see benefits in all of these things. I see how God has blessed the pruning of my relationships. It hurt so incredibly deeply at the time, but now that I'm slightly, and yes I mean slightly, over the hump, God has revealed some of his glory. Crazy.

I digress from my point. Anyway, I just feel moderately unsettled. I'm not sure what that feeling means, or if I even need to devote any mental processing to such a task; it's just odd.

Weak Week.

This week. . .

I had three coffee dates in one day, all of which were amazing.
I got three hours of sleep two nights in a row and operated purely on coffee.
I Skyped with a brother in France :)
I freaked out about getting/not getting offered RA.
I was blessed to NOT have to take an exam because of random snow.
I owned a Cognitive Psychology exam.
I was depressed for no reason.
I argued with others and worked things out.
I was shocked by how not involved in the lives of others that I am.
God really used a significant brother to speak truth into my life.
I responded selfishly and immaturely.
I am more aware of my sin.
I was offered the RA position on Sutherland for next year.
My best friend and roommate was also offered the RA position.
Then I freaked out about getting offered RA (in a bad way).

I realized that sometimes getting what I want can be really, really sobering.

αγάπη.

Love.

It's tattooed on my right wrist. But I have no idea what it means. And I'm realizing that more every day.

So, I ask myself, why the reminder of that which I don't understand? Exactly. I need to be reminded every day that I don't understand what I need the most. Read on.

I've been having a difficult time lately for multiple reasons. My coping strategy (when I'm in my right mind) is to journal. I process by writing. Well, I got to a point in my writing where I was able to admit to myself that I operate out of fear much of the time. Then I listed my fears. I stopped after I realized that I may run out of paper (I really like my current journal). I fear failure, I fear the disapproval of those I care about, I fear rejection, I fear being alone, I fear not knowing what's coming next.

Surprisingly, I was in my right mind, so I thought. What does Jesus have to say about these fears? Well, I read Matthew 6, but it wasn't until I had coffee today with a dear brother that I realized the most important concept Jesus has to offer concerning fear in this passage:

"But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well." (Matthew 6:33)

What does this mean? It means that I need to seek God and have confidence in the fact that His cloak of righteousness has been attributed to me, even in my depravity. I have the ability to love through Jesus. I have the opportunity to be a lover and a recipient of love if I seek his righteousness. But I haven't been taking advantage of this opportunity. . .

All I can do is praise God for answer to prayers. He really provided for me today in the form of speaking truth through good friends. I was able to be honest and receive rebuke because of Jesus working through one individual. I was able to taste a little of God's love for me. It's sweet nectar. How could I go after anything else? Why would I go after anything else?

Jesus, please give me the ability to see you and you only. Enable me to seek your righteousness and operate out of love, not fear of the created or of man. Amen.

Answers.

In your struggle against sin, you have not yet resisted to the point of shedding your blood. And you have forgotten that word of encouragement that addresses you as sons:

"My son, do not make light of the Lord's discipline,
and do not lose heart when he rebukes you,
6because the Lord disciplines those he loves,
and he punishes everyone he accepts as a son."

Endure hardship as discipline; God is treating you as sons. For what son is not disciplined by his father? If you are not disciplined (and everyone undergoes discipline), then you are illegitimate children and not true sons. Moreover, we have all had human fathers who disciplined us and we respected them for it. How much more should we submit to the Father of our spirits and live! Our fathers disciplined us for a little while as they thought best; but God disciplines us for our good, that we may share in his holiness. No discipline seems pleasant at the time, but painful. Later on, however, it produces a harvest of righteousness and peace for those who have been trained by it.

Hebrews 12.4-11

Today.

I hate everyone.

~ Little Miss Sunshine

Eclectia.

The past two weeks have been an eclectic mix of joy, depression, achievement, feelings of bitterness, feelings of sympathy, and longing. I'm not sure how to handle it all.

First things first, I'm realizing that I'm wrong most of the time. I don't mean that in a pessimistic way, but I mean that God is actively showing me my sin, while also allowing me to see the sins of my brothers in a humble, new light. Honestly, I don't like this transformation at all. It hurts and I can't see the proverbial "light at the end of the tunnel." This kind of work is slowly decaying my closest friendships at an uncanny pace, and the progression is unstoppable (at least by me).

Hindsight is a truly beautiful thing, so I'm hoping that two weeks, or maybe a month from now, I'll look back and smile at how God was truly working in my life during this time. But right now, it suuuuccckkkkkks.

Today I ran my first half-marathon in about two hours. It felt good until afterwards when my lower intestine viciously turned against me in an attempt to disillusion my achievement. It almost worked. BUT no matter what, I feel highly accomplished. I'm looking forward to doing it again in November :)

I Love Words.

Dr. Eames used this word today in Cognitive Psychology: kerfuffle.

I immediately looked it up, and it's an an actual word. Fantastic.

It means: disturbance: a disorderly outburst or tumult.

Rant #1

You know the feeling when you had a bad day, and you just want someone to ask you 'why,' so you can spill to them? I do.

It happens so often that my close friends view me as the 'counselor' and see me as 'complaining' whenever I try to vent. However, it's perfectly fine for me to get an earful.

Whew, I feel much better.

Attack on Covenant College or Good Theology?

Hmmm. . .

Check this.

Be Still.

Be still, my soul; thy God doth undertake
To guide the future as He has the past.
Thy hope, thy confidence, let nothing shake;
All now mysterious shall be bright at last.
Be still, my soul; the waves and winds still know
His voice who ruled them while He dwelt below.

Meeting of the Minds.

Salvador Dali (possibly my favorite artist) met Sigmund Freud in 1938. I would have absolutely loved to have been a fly on the wall during that conversation. . .

They're People.

I'm sure that this post will sound slightly cliche, but its truth runs deep.

Much of the time, we go through life viewing people as no more than a "title." The guy working behind the drive-thru window at Taco Bell is, in our minds, "just the drive-thru guy." The slightly awkward teenage girl with braces that tears your ticket at the movie theater is, in our minds, "just the awkward teenage girl who should probably think about running a comb through her hair."

However, as a recent victim of this view that people are just "roles," I've been challenged to look past jobs and/or positions of authority and see that these are actually God's children that I'm dealing with. Everyone I interact with daily, even those I don't know at all, has an intricate story that has led them to that specific moment in time. The story could be riddled with flowers and rose pedals, with despair and neglect, a mix of the two, or something totally different. Whatever the case, each person you meet has a story and has value in the Body of Christ.

I'm sure that I'll neglect to take my previous statements as seriously as I would like sometime today, primarily because this selfish way of thinking is so engraved in my brain. But, here's the take home point folks: in your daily interactions, please remember that each person you encounter does not just have a singular interpersonal interaction with you and that there's so much that may be going on behind those eyes. Life is intrapersonal as well as relational. Keep this in mind as you interact with your RA, your best friend, your spouse, your professors, the mail room clerk, the waitress. . .

Be Kind, for everyone you meet is fighting a hard battle. ~ Plato

Quote Book #1

Yet from this fog his affection emerged -- the best contacts are when one knows the obstacles and still wants to preserve a relation.

This is from Tender is the Night by F. Scott Fitzgerald, which I finished over the break. One of the characters, Dick Diver, thinks it when referring to a woman whom he has an affair with. But nevertheless, the statement (despite the context) is solid. I especially could see this proving to be true in marriage. I know that it's been true in some of my close friendships.

Think about it in a different context. God knows that we are absolutely depraved and sinful, yet he loves us. He sent his Son to die in order to preserve a relationship with us. We should model this method of thinking whenever we're in a spat with our friends.

What is Juice?

Yesterday I made grape juice from real grapes. I mashed them by hand and boiled them myself. In this picture, they look like snot and boogers. But it was delicious.

Telephone

Hey Bibs, I was there too :)

Fashun

Denim.

I stay away from denim, unless it's jeans because it's just too risky.

But, if you are going to wear denim above your waste in any way, please adhere to the following guidelines:

a. Don't have your jeans and your upper body denim match completely.
b. Do not tuck your denim in.
c. Do not do (a) and (b) at the same time.
d. Do not wear acid wash denim.
e. Do not pop your collar while wear denim.


Also, I need to say that I am more than excited to get back to Covenant, and especially my hall. There are a few certain people that I miss A TON, so please don't be surprised if I squeeze your guts out when I see you. It's mere excitement.

Why I Hated (500) Days of Summer.

I typically like trendy alt-culture things (skinny jeans, The Shins, flannel, and the like), but I did NOT like this movie. Don't get wrong, the music was amazing and yes, the story line was different. But, the philosophy behind the movie is a sure sign that the American culture consumed with the "alternative," "non fairy-tale ending" side of life, has actually settled for existential nihilism.

I'm typically overdramatic, but I seriously ended the movie feeling nauseated. Probably because of this statement by the Narrator:

If Tom had learned anything, it’s that you can’t ascribe great cosmic significance to a simple earthly event. Coincidence. That’s all anything ever is. Nothing more than coincidence. It took a long time, but Tom had finally learned. There are no miracles. There is no such thing as fate. Nothing is meant to be. He knew. He was pretty sure.

I'm not going to take the typical "Christian" point of view of why this statement is "sinful" or any of that, but seriously people? What does that mean? What else is there? If everything is merely coincidence, then YOU DON'T MATTER.

Other reasons for dislike include:
1. Summer is freaking manic.
2. Tom is obsessive.
3. Summer is extremely selfish.
4. The "oh my gosh, I'm so alt and elusive, I don't know what I want in life" girl is becoming a sad stereotype.

Please don't get me wrong, I'm not asking for a 'happy ending,' just merely a more redeeming worldview than 'blah blah I'm happy so my isolated life is more important than anyone.'

But, the music was wonderful :)

Twenty-Ten

I'm going to lie and say that starting a blog was a New Years Resolution.

In reality, I've had a blog for a while (Summer 2009), but now that I see that so many of my friends have a blog on Blogspot instead of Tumblr, I have decided to create one of these things.

More posts to come. Cheers to a smashing New Year.